How to tell when a Girl Is Interested in you...

So you have your heart set on a girl but aren't sure she's feeling the same way. You want to ask her out, and you think there's a good chance she likes you back, but how can you be sure? Well, you can't be 100% certain that she likes you until you ask, but before you do that, you can look for a few tell-tale signs that she has a crush on you, too. See Step 1 below to get started.

Part 1 of 3: Seeing the Physical Signs

1. 
   See if her pupils get larger when she talks to you. If this is the case, then she may have a crush on you. Look into her eyes to see if her pupils get larger without creeping her out. This is a sign that she's excited about being around you. Of course, if you're in a room and the lights suddenly dim, then her pupils may get larger, too.
    
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   Check her posture around you. When she's around you, she will seem to stand taller, pull her shoulders back, and pull her stomach in.You can even try to be slick and check out her posture when she walks away from you, or when she doesn't know you're around.
   • You'll see her licking her lips, touching her neck or lifting her head so that more of her neck is exposed.
   • She may lean toward you more, or move closer to you. She might lean in to whisper as an excuse to get closer.
   • Flared nostrils can be a sign of interest, although this might be hard to detect without looking a little too interested in her nose!
   • She might start playing with her hair and wiping imaginary dust off your clothes.
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   See if she blushes around you. Look for the blush; that's a fairly good sign that she's into you. If she blushes just from seeing you, being around you, or saying hello to you, then it may be because she's flustered because she likes you. To be sure, watch her around other people to see if she's the kind of person who blushes easily.
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   See if she imitates you. Imitation really is the highest form of flattery -- and a sign that she likes you. Watch for her touching you and mirroring your movements. These are signs too that she's interested.
5. 
   5
   Catch her looking at you. She will start to maintain eye contact and even lock eyes with you once she's interested in you. She will scan your face, do a double-take, and give you a darting glance, then a second look. She may also look doe-eyed or dewy-eyed when she looks at you.
   • If she looks down at the ground, it may mean that she is shy and nervous to make eye contact.
   • Take a moment during class, after studies, or whenever she's around to check out where she's looking. If she's watching you or looks at you and then quickly looks away when she spots that you've seen her, she's interested. These little glances mean that she's thinking about you, a lot. Focusing her view on you is a great sign of interest.
   • Avoid showing embarrassment about catching her glancing at you. That is the last thing she'd want to make you feel and in turn this would make her feel embarrassed. Act naturally, smile and look away to give her the space to recover.
   • Remember that if she's really shy, she may not look at you. If she is staring at you and smiling, she's definitely into you, but if she isn't she could just be shyer. Staring is definitely a sign of infatuation. Don't be upset if she isn't smiling, most girls don't. Be careful though, be wary if she is day-dreaming or staring. Usually you can tell if she looks away for a little while, then turns to look back at you. If she continuously stares, it may be day-dreaming.
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   Watch her movements around you. Is she turning up everywhere you seem to be? Is she showing a sudden interest in things that you're keen on but she's not so big on, such as your football games? If she is willing to go out of the way to an event or game she'd normally have nothing to do with, this is a big hint that she's interested in you. It gets even clearer for you if she takes the time to ask you questions about the game or about your involvement in it; that means she's definitely into you.
• Maybe you see her suddenly hanging around your group of friends when you never saw her in that circle before. It could be her way of trying to get closer to you.

Part 2 of 3: Noticing Her Actions

1. 
   1
   See if she compliments you a lot. If she compliments you on a shot or kick you made or asks you why you didn't play, it shows that she has been paying as much attention (if not more) to your individual involvement than the game itself. She may also be using the compliment as an excuse to talk to you more, which is also a big sign that she likes you.
   • If she compliments something you did when it really wasn't all that great, then there's even more of a chance that she's into you.
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   Spend time with her before assuming anything about her. It's important to get to know her better and to give her the chance to get to know you too. Find a shared activity, like a sport, a hobby, a club, or even just hanging around chatting during lunch hour so that you can simply be around one another long enough to get the vibe. While you may be tempted to lock eyes across a crowded room and know "she's the one", it's a lot better to try and spend time around each other before letting instant attraction do all the decision-making.
   • The more time you spend with her, the more you'll get to know her, and the easier it will be to tell if she really likes you.
3. 
   Listen to what she says. If a girl is interested in you, some of the things she says will start to give away her interest. For example, she might suddenly start to call you by a pet name and start complimenting you. Other verbal signs of interest in you include giggling, laughing at your jokes even if they're pretty lame, and asking for your help.
   • See if she's trying to be coy or playful or just telling you something that you think is calculated to make you like her. If she burps in front of you, confesses something embarrassing, or tells you about a guy she has a crush on, then she probably sees you as a friend because she's a little too comfortable around you for her feelings to be romantic.
4. 
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   See if she laughs at your jokes. Crack a joke. It doesn't matter how bad it is; if she's interested in you, she'll laugh. If she's not into you, you'll get such responses as a steely look and no laugh at all, a pitying smile, or a condescending comment.
   • Women tend to laugh more at the jokes of people they like, even if they're not all that funny.
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   See what kind of questions she asks you. It's a really good sign if she asks you a question she could easily find the answer to herself because it means she's using the question as an excuse to talk to you. See if she asks you about your plans; she may be trying to find out if you're hanging out with other girls. Most obviously, if she asks you if you have a girlfriend or if you like any girls, then she's probably interested in you (as long as she's not asking for a friend.)
   • If you have a class together, and she asks you for the homework, when she could easily ask one of her friends instead, then it's a great sign that she's just looking for excuses to talk to you.
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   Look for a change in her personality. Personality changes can be a big sign of her interest in you – look for signs such as her being bubblier, quieter, or somehow different from her usual self when she's around you. Such changes indicate nervousness in your vicinity and this nervousness is a sign she has a crush on you.
   • Try to notice how she acts around other people when she doesn't think you're around or paying attention. This can clue you in to how she "normally" acts so it'll be easier to spot a difference when she's around you.
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   See how she acts when you surprise her. Sit down next to her at lunch, or during an activity, totally out of the blue. This will mean that she doesn't have the time to prepare herself to meet you and her flustered responses will tell you a lot about her feelings for you. Just don't catch her when she's too surprised, like if she's checking to see if there's something in her teeth or really wrapped up in a conversation with one of her friends.
   • If she's showing off around you, that's a sure sign she likes you and is trying to impress you.
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   Strike up a conversation about things that she is interested in. Even if she is shy, try and draw her out by asking her about her own interests. If she seems comfortable talking to you about herself and about her interests and points of view with you, this might indicate that she is keen on you. If she shares opinions and comments with you in a way that suggests she is being careful not to sound too strident, bossy, or opinionated, this could mean that she's toning down her usual bravado to encourage you to take an interest in her.
   • Does she talk to you more than she talks to other people (anybody not obviously a friend)? If she's usually not extremely talkative, and usually waits for someone else to start a conversation, it's a good sign for you! It means she's trying hard to gain your attention.
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   See how her friends react to you. Go up to her when her friends are all around her. If they suddenly disperse to leave the "two of you alone together", it means she has already told them she likes you and has asked them to scram should you come along. Also, you can see how her friends react when you just walk by them. Do they giggle, whisper to each other, or give you a knowing smile? If so, then that's another sign that she might like you.
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    Compliment other girls when you talk to her. If she responds icily or visibly blanches or stiffens, you've just brought out her jealousy, which means she likes you for herself. Don't keep her in this state; brush off the compliment as something vague and come back with a compliment twice as good directed at her alone. You don't want to do this too much or she'll think that you like someone else instead of her, or that you're a smooth talker who doesn't actually like her.
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    Say hello when you see her talking to another guy. If she appears flustered, uncomfortable, or looks down, this may be a sign that she's not happy about you thinking that she likes this guy over you. If she didn't have any response or simply waved back vaguely, this would indicate that she's not that interested into you. Also realize that she may be more shy around you than she is around guys she considers to be "just friends".
    • See if she looks to you for your reaction when she is talking about things with others, especially with other guys. This can be a sign that she cares more about how you react than about the other people she's talking to.
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    See if she asks you lots of questions. If the girl just nods vaguely when she wants to talk to you, then she may be getting bored and is ready to leave. But if she asks you lots of questions, whether she's asking about you or the thing you're talking about, or brings up a completely unrelated topic, then she may be furthering the conversation because she likes you.
    • It makes sense: if she likes you, then she'll want to know more about you.
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    See if she likes to stick around when you talk to her. If she keeps checking her phone or looking around when you talk to her, shifting her weight like she's looking for an excuse to leave, then she may not be into you. But if she leans in, laughs a lot, and seems to just like being in your orbit, then chances are that she's doing this because she likes being around you.
    • Though she'll leave eventually, you can check to see whether it looks like she's ready to bolt at any second, or if she's comfortable staying right where she is when she talks to you.

Part 3 of 3: Asking Her Out

1. 
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   Listen to your own senses. How do you feel when you're around her? Do you feel happy, giddy, and excited? Does she make you feel good about yourself and do you feel like you want to spend more time around her? These are good signs that you're feeling good about her and that you're happy to contemplate asking her to be your girlfriend.
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   See if she hints that she wants you to ask her out. She may want you to ask her on a date but doesn't want to be too obvious about it. However, there are some tell-tale signs that she wants to take your relationship to the next level. For example, she may ask you about what you're doing over the weekend and mention that she's not doing much. When you mention a hobby, she may say she'd like to try it some time. If you mention a movie that's coming out and she blurts out, "I'd love to see it!" then she may be asking you to invite her to go.
   • She may be shy, though. Just because she doesn't hint toward this doesn't mean she doesn't like you.
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   Pluck up the courage and tell her that you like her. You've had all the indications above, and you've decided the feelings are mutual and you'd really like her to be your girlfriend. The next logical step is to own up to liking her enough to want to be her boyfriend and to hope that she'll respond in kind.
   • Pick a place where you can be alone, and be casual about it. Let her know you're interested without putting on too much pressure.
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   Don't beat yourself up if she says no. Sometimes you'll get all the signals because a girl is naturally flirty with everyone. She isn't doing it to be mean, it's just who she is and you'll need to keep looking!
   • Also if she says no, she could be very nervous, confused, or playing hard to get. She could also be having some problems at home or with a parent who doesn't want their child to have a boyfriend. She might simply not be ready.
   • Know beforehand if she already has a date. That could make life very complicated unless you're prepared to be the cause of a rupture in that relationship! If she's not keen on exclusive relationships, find this out as soon as possible before you end up being hurt.
    

Tips

• If you never ask a girl out because you can't be certain she's interested in you, you'll stay single all your life. What an unhappy prospect that sounds! So do it, ask her and realize that sometimes there will be rejection and other times there will be a resounding yes!
• Girls can be too shy to ask you out. Even in an age where it's considered fine for girls to do the asking, a lot of girls will wait because there is a certain romance attached to the idea of the guy doing the asking. It also helps her to know that you're serious when you take the initiative to ask; remember that if you're afraid of rejection, so is she.
• Be careful of which words you use when complimenting a girl; the type of compliment you give depends on the girl. While some girls like being called "hot," other prefer being called "beautiful" and may take offense to being called "hot," or vice versa. Just use your judgment when you compliment her.
• Watch her friends reaction when you are around. If her friends are giving her playful nudges and giggling, she may have told them that she likes you. Also watch for her reaction towards her friends; if she frowns at them or stares into their very soul, she may know what her friends are up to! Be observant.
• If she tries to get your attention as much as possible, that may be a sign that she is interested in you.
• If her friends come and talk to you, about her or about your previous past love life, she most likely sent them to make herself sound more appealing and attractive. (Sometimes, it is an obvious hint that she wants you to talk to her.)
• When having a conversation together, don't pressure her. Just treat the conversation as a normal one, and act as natural as possible.
• Don't try too hard. You might think she'd prefer a guy who acts in a certain way but change your normal approach and you're likely to just freak her out and her wondering what's gone wrong with you! Don't fake anything; just be yourself.
• Girls like it when they get to talk to you alone, especially if they are shy, because they won't have to worry about what someone else will think of them whilst they are talking to you.
• Don't string out asking her too long. If she gets cold or disinterested vibes from you, she'll start steeling herself for the worst and will eventually lose interest in you in order to self-protect from possible hurt. Take a little time to be sure she is interested and that you're interested in her but then get to it and ask her out!
• If you are clever with it, observational humour is a good way to strike up a conversation.
• If you intend on giving a girl a gift when you want to show that you like her, keep it small and unique, like a love note, a single rose, a bracelet, or something she can wear.
• Always be nice.
• If she gives you things, this is a sign she likes you. It could be cards, badges, stamps, small items, tickets, etc., just as long as she attaches significance to the gifting.
• Make sure she isn't dating someone already.
• If a guy is teasing her, she most likely wants to see if you will protect her (as her boyfriend of course)! But don't get so rough that you guys get into a fist-fight!
• When a girl is really interested in you she will not be afraid to go to your house and get you to hangout or talk. If she has friends around you then she also feels safe around you. This is a very good sign she is interested.
• In this age with social media and all you can also look for signs of her interest on something she tweets or makes her status. Often if she makes it a title of a song that has lyrics related to a situation that you two were involved in this could be a sign that she shows interest in you as she was still thinking about you afterwards, and the song reminded her of you.
• Girls love honesty. If they're interested in you don't be shy. Be yourself, tell lame jokes and if she laughs, you have a high chance of getting to know her more.
• If she compliments you, keep the conversation flowing! Compliment her back and see how she reacts!

 

Warnings

• Avoid rushing her. While holding the girl's hand or putting your hands around her waist may seem like a nice thing to do, make sure that she feels the same way or you may offend her. It is very important not to rush things, since you risk the girl's opinion of you. Do not forcefully take her hand or touch her. If she is showing signs of irritation, immediately stop touching her, or she may think that you are possessive and controlling.
• If you're full of yourself and she works this out quickly, watch her interest drop just as fast. Be considerate, thoughtful, and kind and she'll respond likewise.
• Don't be a stalker. That's creepy and there are laws about that kind of behavior.
• Never confess that you like her in front of others. If she rejects you, you'll both be embarrassed. And she might just be shy to admit it. It's a good idea not to tell your friends, nor family who you love before you tell the girl you love her first.
• Be funny but not at her expense. If you want to be mean, sarcastic, and weird, no matter how interested in you she seems, she won't be for much longer.
• Don't try to kiss someone without asking unless you are one hundred percent sure they're in the moment, too. If you jump on a person that doesn't want to be kissed, you could very well end up with a black eye. Plus, it will be incredibly awkward the next day if you are rejected, especially if she decides to tell her friends. On the other hand, if you're really sure she's into you, you could try kissing her out of nowhere. Softly and slowly to gauge her reaction, though. If you lean in and she turns her face or starts talking, then stop. If you kiss a girl that likes you out of nowhere, she might find it incredibly romantic and heart pounding.
• Don't ask your friends to find out if she likes you. She'll probably sense something weird and think you're playing games with her.
• Only compliment a girl if the compliment itself is true. For example, never say "Hey, I like your shirt" if you do not actually like the shirt. It's better to say nothing at all, or look for something else to compliment.
• Be wary of girls that do not know what they want. If they say that they like you and then take it back, they are indecisive. Waiting for someone like this for too long will only cause you pain and will make you lose time that could have been used to find someone that actually likes you. If they don't know what they want, you don't want to spend time filling that gap until they do know.
• Don't confess your undying love to her or send her poems unless you're dating seriously. This might push her away from you and might come out too strong. Try something along the lines of "You're really fun to be around, do you wanna hang out sometime? On Friday I'm going to..." and go from there.
• Don't compliment on something weird, such as "You open your locker really fast" . This might make the girl think you're weird. Of course, if this is your type of humor, then go for it, and if she thinks you're weird, you aren't for her.

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Gangsta Rap Made Me Do It: Subconscious Racism & Hip Hop

"Fuck the police."

It's a mantra that hip-hop listeners are all too familiar with. Year after year, statistics prove that the black community in America--particularly in lower-class neighborhoods--is subjected to unjust treatment from those supposedly designated to protect them. For the most part, these are the same communities that dominate the rap marketplace. It makes sense, then, that emcees would want to utilize their elevated status to take a stand against those who have continually treated them as second-class citizens. But what if antagonizing cops is actually exacerbating the problem and contributing to an endless cycle of violence?
The following article is not intended to provide answers. The scenario about to be presented is very much a chicken-or-the-egg kind of situation, so any point made here has an equal-but-opposite argument that's as valid as the first. The idea here is to get a conversation going and see how we, as hip-hop listeners, writers, and artists, can promote positive change. If this is a conversation you think is worth having, please read on.


How Hip Hop (And The Media) Contributes To Subconscious Racism
It's no secret that the media is about as kind to the black community as they are to sharks. With few black actors getting cast in principal roles for films that aren't about "the hood" and the majority of news outlets pushing every piece of gang-related violence they can get their hands on for easy ratings, the population is hardly portrayed in a positive light. (Hell, the first black Disney princess didn't come around until 2009.) This imagery sticks with people in socially destructive ways.
I won't try and defend the other mediums for their haphazard treatment of racial issues. (That's a topic for another day.) But the major difference between television and news in comparison with hip-hop music is that the other two come from outside perspectives. It's hard to blame news outlets for airing what will drive ratings, and it's hard to blame white screenwriters for not writing great black leads. Hip-hop artists, on the other hand, choose to, and often will, glorify (or "report," as I'll address later) gang violence and demonize the police for no reason other than to be "street." This, unfortunately, is a direct result of listeners pressuring artists to live up to those standards. Even a multi-platinum artist like Drake can't release a song without being called "soft." We live in a supply and demand society; if mainstream listeners start boycotting records that poorly represents the community and supporting those which don't, the rap game would change substantially.
There's a long-held myth that rap music--or anything with violent lyrics really--promotes violence, misogyny, and substance abuse. Whether or not that's true is certainly up to debate. What isn't up to debate, however, is that hip-hop artists have an enormous influence, not just within their community, but in how the rest of the world sees that community. When N.W.A. released Straight Outta Compton, they set the standard for what the outside world expects to find in South Central LA. To date, passers-by roll up their windows and lock their doors when they through the area. Now imagine that person passing through, anxious and fearful, is a cop with a gun. That's not a safe situation for the cop or the community.


"I give you the news with a twist of just his ghetto point of view." -Jay Z
You could argue, as many rappers have, that N.W.A's album didn't create Compton's culture, it simply reported it; that if the communities are fixed then the music will be too. The problem with this argument is that it implies that the fixing can be accomplished entirely by the government itself. In order for the police and the ruling powers to fix communities like those in Detroit, St. Louis, and Chicago, there has to be cooperation within the areas. The "fuck the police" and similarly counterproductive "don't snitch" agendas pushed through the music in those regions all but ensure that this cooperation never happens.
Now, that being said, there are productive ways to do this reporting. Following the incident with Mike Brown, J. Cole penned a touching tribute filled with the sorrow and humanity. It's the kind of track that instigates empathy--the kind of music that hip-hop needs more of in general.
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Sex positions for mind-blowing orgasms!

O, yes

  

I always thought it was a myth that there are certain sex positions that can help a woman climax faster and better. Say it isn't so? If this is true, why haven't we been schooling our men? I took my inquiry to the sex-perts and uncovered that there are, in fact, such positions. Obviously, I'm going to share them with you -- that way, we can all be having the best sex of our lives! Read on for the top 10 sex positions for achieving mind-blowing orgasms.

1

The butterfly position or modified missionary

"With the woman on her back and her hips on the edge of the bed, the man penetrates her while standing. She then puts her legs over his shoulders and tilts her hips slightly upwards. This gives a wonderful angle for cervical stimulation with deep penetration that can produce some intense vaginal and uterine orgasms. With more shallow penetration, a man can stimulate the anterior vaginal wall to hit the G-spot."

--Dr. Madeleine M. Castellanos, a psychiatrist who specializes in sex therapy

2

Modified coital alignment technique

"A couple starts off in missionary position. Once a man penetrates a woman deeply, he allows her to bring her legs together between his. He then shifts his weight slightly forward so that the shaft of his erection is producing firm pressure and friction on her clitoris as he moves. This works very well for women that prefer to have clitoral stimulation during penetration to reach a very powerful orgasm."
--Dr. Castellanos

3

Baring the scepter

"Either partner can perform this technique, although the bottom person's hands may be more able to pull it off. Form a ring with thumb and forefinger around the base of the penis. Then, pull down so the skin on the shaft is taut. This exposes more nerve endings and increases the penis' sensitivity -- it can also help maintain his erection. Engage in intercourse with your hand still encircling the base to send his pleasure soaring."
--Jaiya, new world sex educator and author of "Red Hot Touch"

4

The counter top

"This is my favorite. It's when the woman is laying on her back on the counter or table while he enters standing. It's rough. There's pushing aside of papers, pepper shakers which add to the sense of urgency and inappropriateness. It's easy to maneuver and move the woman to slide along the counter. There is still contact. He goes deep and feels in control. It works all the way around. The keys are clothing, stuff in the way, and being in an open space. Still allows for connection while feeling dirty. It just works on so many levels. It's not about acrobats. It's about context."
--Margaret Wagner, sex expert and founder of Bedroom Matters

5

The seated scissors

"This position allows the woman to have the control in order to determine the depth and angle of penetration, as well as how much clitoral stimulation she gets. With the man laying flat on his back and his knees bent, she straddles him with one leg to the side of his hip, and the other leg between his legs. The woman can then find just the right spot to grind against his pubic bone with him inside her. She controls the pace, the depth, and the amount of pressure and friction she receives. This is definitely a prescription for mind-blowing sex!"
--Dr. Castellanos

6

Get off, stand up

"I'm no [pro], but whenever I've had sex standing up and holding my partner in the air or up against the wall, it's been mind-blowing for both of us. I suspect it taps into some of our innate gender differences: the strong man and the small woman, which in turn heightens the sexual experience. It also forces us to be in a full embrace, which furthers the emotional connection, as well as our physical one. It's physically demanding and not for all couples but for those that can, it's highly recommended."
--Jim, an experienced heterosexual male

7

Uncloaking the clit

"Given a woman's clitoris is buried under the clitoral hood and cushiony mons pubis surrounding it, it's no wonder this tiny nub rarely receives enough stimulation during intercourse to catch the O-train. Your hands, though, can help change that. Form a 'V' with your index and middle finger and point your fingers toward your feet. Press this V onto the mons pubis, with a finger to each side of the clitoris. Then, pull up, moving the skin with your hand. This should unveil the hard-to-reach clit in all its glory, exposing this little love button to a lot more action."
--Jaiya

8

Shake 'n' bake

"If you're craving a quick-but-stimulating break from intercourse, this move is the perfect titillating timeout. To do it, the man withdraws and rests the tip of his penis on the clitoris. Then, hold the base of the penis and shake it quickly from side to side so that the head hits the clitoris with every wiggle. In doing so, you'll be stimulating both heads at once -- that of the clitoris and the penis -- which should send you both into paroxysms of pleasure."
--Jaiya

9

Pushing tush

"If your guy enjoys having his back door explored, reach around with both hands and grab both cheeks. From there, you can do 'Butt Yoga' (a technique whereby you spread the cheeks apart, then together, one up one down then vice versa) or 'Anal Yoga' (a technique whereby you place your middle fingers to the sides of the anus then spread them apart, then diagonally, then up and down). If that gets him hankering for more, feel free to delve deeper."
--Jaiya

10

Happy scissors

"Heating up hot spots aren't your hands-only talents. They're also great at moving body parts where you want them, and this technique is a prime opportunity. During intercourse, raise your legs, then have your man hold an ankle in each hand. From there, you can spread her legs apart, hold them together, part them at 80 degrees, the options are endless. And since the tendons of the legs pivot deep in the pelvic cavity, moving them around will subtly alter the below-the-belt sensations for you both. Talk about getting a leg up on a little variety!"
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Here’s How Long It Actually Takes to Get Over a Breakup

'Tis the season for relationship status updates—yes, engagements, but also breakups, as the pressure to meet families or decide on happily ever after gets to be too much. Any breakup can seem like the end of the world , but during the holiday season? It's like adding salt to the wound. Luckily, there's a light at the end of the Ben & Jerry-lined tunnel.

© Marko Gligorov/Getty Images Couple breaking up

It takes three months post-breakup to start viewing the experience in a positive light, according to a study published in the Journal of Positive Psychology. Researchers surveyed 155 young adults who's recently gone through a break (approximately 11 weeks before the poll), and found that 71 percent agreed with positive statements like "I have learned a lot about myself," "I have grown as a person," and "I am more goal-oriented." 

Here's an important note: this positive perspective developed regardless of whether the study participant had been the one to initiate the breakup. According to the scientists, these results prove that "growth and positive emotions may be a larger part of the relationship dissolution of experience than previously thought." So, instead of wallowing, queue up Ariana Grande—it's time to " Break Free " from that past relationship. 

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